Saturday, November 04, 2006

What Women Really Want In Sex: How Can Men Do It Better and Help her Reach Orgasm Faster

How Does She Reach Orgasm?

The female orgasm is the sexual Holy Grail – it's the subject of hundreds of books and countless conversations behind closed doors. But in this modern age, there’s no reason for men to be baffled by the where, what and how of the female orgasm – bringing her pleasure may not always be easy, but it shouldn’t be a mystery.

One size doesn’t fit all

Some women find they reach orgasm very easily, and can orgasm multiple times during a single lovemaking session, while some women rarely orgasm, sometimes going into their 30's without climaxing, although that’s quite rare. Most women, though, fall somewhere between these two extremes. Any woman deserving of your attentions in the bedroom is equally deserving of an orgasm, so take a few minutes to learn what she likes, what she needs and how to get her there.

Men may not want to hear it, but most women don’t orgasm from sexual intercourse alone. So if your lady puts on an operatic show complete with moans, whimpers and high-pitched screams every time you engage in the missionary position, she might just be a good actress. According to a survey by Jane magazine, only 43 percent of their female readers said they experienced orgasm every time they had sex, and 19 percent said they had never experienced an orgasm at all.

It’s all about stimulation

It’s said that the largest sexual organ is the brain. For a woman to achieve orgasm, she needs to be stimulated mentally as well as physically. Most women need to feel emotionally intimate with their partner before they’re comfortable enough to let go, although even the most casual encounter can be arousing enough to lead to a powerful orgasm. Whatever it is that turns the woman on, if she’s not powerfully aroused then she’s not going to climax – it’s that simple.

As with male arousal, there are certain physical signs that a woman is becoming turned on. Vasocongestion occurs, with blood rushing to her breasts, vagina and clitoris. Her vagina becomes lubricated, making sexual intercourse easier. As orgasm approaches, her muscles tense and then, when climax occurs, muscles will contract in her vagina, rectum, and uterus – her sexual pleasure can even be monitored by her brain waves!

First and foremost, don't forget foreplay!

Foreplay is absolutely vital to help her achieve orgasm. Sure, those surprise, lustful, passionate encounters are great, but most women need a prelude to the main event. Think of it as getting her motor warmed up before the two of you go on a long, exciting ride – don’t neglect the pre-sex make-out session, because the longer you draw out the tension, the better the payoff will be. Kissing, fondling, oral play, undressing – these are all fun, exciting parts of the sexual experience, and will lead to her being as eager as you are.

Wetter is better

Lubrication is essential if you’re going to be engaging in intercourse. With most women, adequate foreplay will provide all of the natural lubrication necessary, but sometimes it’s not enough. Some women have trouble with vaginal dryness no matter how aroused they are, whether it’s because of medications they’re taking, their age (pre-menopausal women especially) or where they are in their hormonal cycle. There’s no shame in using one of the many products manufactured specifically for this purpose – if you’re feeling adventurous, there are even flavored lubricants, and products that warm as you use them. Intercourse without proper lubrication is painful, so show her you care by making sure she’s as ready as you are.

Size doesn't matter

Yes, there are women who are obsessed with well-endowed men, but most women won’t demand that you wield an excessively large penis. The average penis size is only 5.5 inches, which doesn’t sound like much. But the depth of the average vagina is just six inches, with the notorious “G-spot” (actually the backside of the clitoris, separated from the vagina by a thin membrane) is just two inches from the entrance of her vagina.

So it really is true – it’s not the size, it’s what you do with it! Despite what you may have heard in the schoolyard, there’s only one way to bring a woman to orgasm, and that’s through stimulation of the clitoris. Some of the world’s best lovers have been men who weren’t especially well-endowed – but they were considerate of their lovers, took their time and gave them the attention they needed to have mind-blowing orgasms.

Remember that she's different than you

Unlike men, a lot of factors must be in play in order for the average woman to achieve a satisfying orgasm through sex. If she's under a lot of pressure, battling emotional problems or has a rocky sexual history, she may have trouble relaxing enough to come to climax. Let her know she can trust you. Ask her to tell you what she likes in bed, even show you if she’s not too shy. This is really the key to satisfying her – making her feel good about her body and about making love with you. Try different things, experiment, play with each other and see what works.

Patience is a virtue

If you want to bring her to orgasm, you're going to have to pull the reins on your own climax. Early ejaculation can put a real damper on an intimate encounter. If you’re young and relatively inexperienced, you may find it difficult to slow things down and give foreplay all of the time that it deserves – but the results will be well worth it if you do. Remember, it’s not a sprint – it’s a marathon. Enjoy the journey, and don’t be in such a rush to cross the finish line.

The female orgasm is indeed complicated, but it doesn't have to be a mystery. If you're kind, considerate and listen to your partner, you're sure to have a wonderful sex life – and you won’t have to wonder whether her orgasms are the real thing.

What Women Want!
Do you know that most relationship or marriage can be long lasting if ONLY you would understand the Woman in your life?
If you are in love with a specific woman, and you “know” she’s the right one for you, you can learn how you can place yourself in her thoughts and her dreams! Everything will be in place for her to fall hopelessly in love with you.
What does your Woman secretly want, desire, and need?
Secrets Revealed will help you to grow her love for you. Click here!

Free Tarot Reading Secrets reveals amazing information about your love and relationship life!


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What Women Want
Love Tips

What She Really Wants: What Women Secretly Admire About Us!

Ah, the age-old question – what do women want? The art of pleasing a woman has bedeviled man since time immemorial, but the answer’s a lot simpler than you think. If you have trouble cracking the code of the elusive female, why not look at the issue from a scientific standpoint?

On the most basic, biological level, women need men to do their share of reproduction. But really, all men need to supply to make a baby is sperm – the woman carries the growing baby and then she is typically burdened with most of the responsibilities of raising that child. Generations of breeding have taught women to instinctively be choosy when it comes to picking a mate, not because they’re demanding or finicky, but because there are certain qualities required to create a safe, successful family.

With modern birth control methods, women no longer have to choose men based on their qualifications as potential father for their children, but thousands of years of evolution have hard-wired certain mating preferences in humans that can’t be denied. In women, characteristics like generosity, resources and social status play significant roles when a woman is selecting her ideal mate – even if she’s unaware that she’s using this ancient yardstick to gauge your worth as a potential partner.

Generosity

Does a woman benefit from marrying a cheapskate? Probably not. If a man is generous with his time and his money, she can feel more secure about her future with him. This doesn’t mean she’s a gold-digger. In any good long-term relationship, both parties generously share their belongings, their emotions and their time. If you’re generous from the very start, you’ll show her that you can be a good provider – and then she can be comfortable being generous, too, knowing that it’s a two-way street.

Resources

Not only must a man be generous, he must have resources to be generous with. Again, the stereotype may spring to mind of the beautiful young blonde latching onto an older, wealthier man – as distasteful as that scenario may be, stereotypes become stereotypes because there’s some truth to them. When a woman is shopping for a lifemate, his income is important.

After all, the more resources he has – money, car, property – the more secure her family will be. Marrying for love is a relatively new invention, after all, and it wasn’t so very long ago that people married purely for financial and social security. You might be a really great guy, but if you work at a minimum wage job and live in your parents’ basement, you aren’t presenting yourself as a very good catch.

Social status

A survey of college students in Massachusetts, Michigan, Texas and California found that women value social status considerably more than men – they dubbed it important and indispensable, while men merely thought it desirable, but not all that important. Keep this in mind when seeking a mate – if you’re a pizza delivery guy and she’s studying for the bar exam, you’re about to find yourselves on very different rungs of the social ladder. Women tend to date at the same level or above themselves socially, which is why you rarely see a plumber married to a female neurosurgeon.

These three traits have affected how women have selected men for over 200,000 years. Does this mean they’re hard and fast rules? Hardly. Society is ever-changing,and the ways in which mean and women relate change with the times. But those primitive needs for security and social status remain, and they’re significant.

Still, what may matter more than anything in the long run are more intangible qualities, like love.

Put simply, women want to be loved.

You can have all the money in the world, but if you can't provide your partner with love and commitment, she’ll find it elsewhere. With more women working side by side with men, making as much – or more – money than they do, and achieving genuine equality, the list of qualities they seek in a mate is changing. Women don't need men to have a successful, healthy, and happy life. They aren’t dependent on men dragging home the biggest elk for dinner – they can hunt, cook and eat that elk themselves! And so the biggest factor in choosing a mate becomes ... love.

If you’re lucky enough to have a woman fall in love with you, then you’re in a perfect position to give her what she wants most of all – you. If she thinks you're the one, that means she wants you. She wants your physical affection, time, commitment, and attention. Remind her, often, of how much you love and care for her, and little else will matter.

The only reason women seem mysterious to men is that men often don’t pay attention to what women tell them they want. It’s as simple as that. Each woman is an individual, with unique hopes, fears, dreams and desires. Listen to her, tell her how beautiful and special she is, and her heart will be yours.

What Women Want!
Do you know that most relationship or marriage can be long lasting if ONLY you would understand the Woman in your life?
If you are in love with a specific woman, and you “know” she’s the right one for you, you can learn how you can place yourself in her thoughts and her dreams! Everything will be in place for her to fall hopelessly in love with you.
What does your Woman secretly want, desire, and need?
Secrets Revealed will help you to grow her love for you. Click here!

Free Tarot Reading Secrets reveals amazing information about your love and relationship life!

Tags: , , , , , , ,
What Women Want
Love Tips