Friday, April 13, 2007

How To Move From Friend To Lover - Dos and Don't For Guys!

When you are friends with a girl it may be hard to hide the fact that those friendship feelings are turning into much more than just that. You may start to feel romantic feelings towards them. This is not unusual and you should not hide the fact that your feelings are changing for them. You need to be open and honest with your feelings and express how you feel about them now.

It is not always easy to move from a friend to a lover. You may find that it is not easy to do this. You may feel embarrassed or nervous about how you are going to be treated. You may be afraid that you will be turned down or laughed at when you tell the girl how you are feeling. However, you still need to be open and honest so that you are not hiding all your feelings inside. These feelings can build up and make your life miserable for not only you but also your relationship with the girl.

In order to be honest with the girl about how you feel, you need to have a good relationship. If you already have this then you should feel comfortable telling them how you feel. There is nothing to worry about. The only thing that you can do is being honest and if the other person cannot handle this, you will probably either stay friends or it can strain the relationship for both of you. This is just something that you will have to accept and take into consideration.

The first thing that you should do is being patient. You need to find the right time to let the girl know how you are feeling. Do not be pushy and never force yourself on her. This is cause for damage to the relationship for sure. You have to allow the other person to let this idea sink in after you tell them how you are feeling. You need to give them their space and let them react in their own time. This is something that is not easy for them to think about especially since you have been friends with the person for so long. The only thing that you can do is telling them with compassion and ease so that you are not scaring them away right from the start.

Once the girl knows and she has had time to think about what you have told her, you need to let her think about it. You should never expect it to be a happy ending right from the start. However maybe in some cases it will be. You may find that the girl has felt the same way about you all along. If this is the case, then you are going to have the ending that you are looking for, if not, then you still have to be patient and let her have time to sink this new idea in. It will take some time for most I am sure.

Make sure that you let her know that you are still going to be there for her as a friend. You do not want to lose the relationship all together. It is important that you let her know that you still want to be in her life whether it is friendly or romantic. You need to allow her to know that she is special in your life and that you want her to be in it no matte what else happens. This is something that you will notice make her feel better and you may end up with a positive reaction.
Do not give her an ultimatum. This is terrible. You should not tell the girl that she has to either be your girlfriend or you are not longer going to be associated with one another. This would be a very bad outcome and not something that you want to happen. There is no need to make her feel any more uncomfortable than she may already. You have to be willing to make it easier on her. If it is then she may be more likely to see the conversation as flattering and it may make her feel good about herself and your relationship together. This is something that you are looking forward to and you want it to happen this way. However, do not get your hopes up too high.

You do not want to be let down if she in fact does not feel the same way. You have to be prepared for the worst but still hope for the best. Do not get discouraged if she does not want to be in a romantic relationship with you. This is not something that should end the rest of your life. You need to be patient and maybe over time you will see that it will turn into something more.

The key is to let her know how you feel because you will feel so much better yourself once you have this off your chest. You do not want to keep something like this bottled up inside yourself. It will only make you feel anxiety and stress more and more as time goes on. Being honest and letting the feelings express themselves in a good way is the best thing that you can do for yourself and for the relationship between the two of you as well.

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